My memories of childbirth with my first daughter are bittersweet.
Of course, I got a beautiful, angelic baby out of the deal, but a rushed Cesarian with a half-asleep doctor and being told that I was not able to see her for a full hour as I “recovered” in a different room was not my idea of the ideal experience.
I knew that I needed to actively seek out an alternative way for my next childbirth.
With my second pregnancy, my original doctor told me that I would need a C-section again.
Once a C-section, always a C-section, I guess. No thank you.
Unless either myself or my baby was in grave danger, I wished to avoid another surgery at all costs.
I had too strong of a belief that childbirth was a natural, normal experience that a female body was well-equipped to handle to sign right up for another one of those.
Friends pointed me to a midwife, Yolanda, who was willing to work with me. She had delivered over 2000 babies in people’s homes, many v-backs, and was a well-respected legend in the community.
Going into my first meeting with her, I was skeptical, nervous, and excited.
No one I knew had had their baby outside of the hospital. Was I being true to myself, or irresponsible and stupid by investigating this path?
Throughout the next nine months I had the time to become fully convinced that I was making the right decision for me to have my baby at home.
Each office visit was leisurely, and over time the midwife became a close family friend.
The visits were spent talking candidly about the pregnancy and drinking chamomile tea in addition to weigh-ins and other medical check-up procedures.
I felt that by the time I went into labor, this woman knew me, my personality, my fears, my strengths and was ready to guide me through this experience in a way that would work best for ME.
My labor was an excruciating 28 hours long, but was actually beautiful , enjoyable, and empowering with Yolanda by my side.
She reminded me that I was one of billions of women in history to have my child naturally at home, that childbirth was a special bond shared between all of the women in the world.
She gave me strength by teaching me to choose to not view the sensation as pain, but just as intensity of energy (this somehow miraculously worked!).
She was familiar with yoga and guided me through pranayama.
She was able to keep me fully present throughout the entire experience, so that I was able to remember and enjoy every single moment.
She treated me as a whole person with fears and emotions and unique quirks, not just as a patient in the hospital line-up. She was by my side from the first contraction to the last, sharing each tear, each giggle, each sigh of exhaustion with me.
Homebirth is definitely not for everyone, and even Yolanda is the first to admit that there is a time and a place for the hospital. But for me, it was a conscious choice to trust in the wisdom of my body, to believe in myself and my own strength, and to welcome my new baby girl into the most relaxed and peaceful environment as possible.
